Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Idiots, Entitlement, and Travelling at Christmas

      I travel at Christmas.  December 27th is generally the busiest post-Xmas travel day and I always fly on that day.  Unfortunately, this year it also brought a massive storm with tornados to the central section of the United States.  And if you travel from one coast to the other, your connecting flight was somewhere in the weather-affected middle of the country.  I know it’s a busy travel day.  I know there is always the possibility of bad weather resulting in delays and cancellations.  I can accept all of that.  What I can’t accept is the people who don’t seem to understand those simple concepts. 

Monday, December 7, 2015

My Christmas Wish List

My Christmas Wish List
  • To never have to hear about or see Donald Trump, Bruce Jenner or any Kardashian ever again.
  • A miracle cure for ALS—as fast as possible.
  • That slow-ass men who can’t hit a golf ball more than 100 yards stop playing from the blues—especially when they are the foursome in front of me.
  • A raise, or a new job that actually pays me enough to live in Southern California.
  • For people to stop texting at the gym while sitting on weight equipment and machines.
  • For everyone to love Mother Earth and reduce, reuse and recycle.
  • For the NRA to fold up and disband.
  • To finally lose that last 5 pounds.
  • That our impending El Nino causes only minimal damage and no deaths.
  • To find someone to share my life with.
  • That gas prices stay under $2.50 forever.
  • For more laughter and fewer tears around the world.
  • For the Browns to trade Johnny Manziel so that I never see him in Brown and Orange again.
  • Clean water for the 700 million-plus people worldwide who currently lack access to it.
  • An end to ‘reality-show’ television.
  • Peace—before it’s too late.

Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Life as a Browns Fan

For the most part, it's a painful existence being a die-hard fan of the Cleveland Browns. The once-storied franchise (before I was born) has become mired in mediocrity. Ever since devil-incarnate Art Modell pulled the rug out from under us by moving the team to Baltimore, we haven't been able to put together a winning season. There are plenty of excuses: Poor draft choices from the beginning: I mean, who drafts a QB from a basketball school? Who follows that up with a QB who is old enough to retire on draft day? Who picks a short guy with questionable arm strength and lots of off-field issues? Yep, the Browns. This is a reflection of bad management and lack of football knowledge. I'm not sure the people in charge in Cleveland actually know all that much about football. Then, of course, there are injuries, but all teams deal with those. We currently have a QB who everybody says is one of the toughest guys they know. He has sacrificed himself physically this season without getting any love in return. Lots of excuses that all teams in any pro sport deal with at various times. Why can't we break out of this vicious cycle? The shocking thing is that it is statistically impossible to be as bad as the Browns have been since we came back to the NFL in 1999. Statistically IMPOSSIBLE! Many teams come up with unbelievable ways to win games. We come up with unbelievable ways to lose games. Did you catch last night's match-up with the Ravens? I watched it at my usual Brownsbackers bar. It was a relatively good game, with back and forth scoring, and a decent look at our 2nd string QB, who threw an awesome long yardage pass for a TD. The Browns came from behind to tie the game late in the 4th quarter. I was confident we were going to win with a field goal. Worst case scenario was going into overtime. Holy crap--how many times is there actually a blocked kick? Believe me, it's not that often. But if some freak occurrence is going to happen, it's going to happen to the Browns. That damn blocked kick was run back for a touchdown as time ran out. But, you know what happened after that? After everyone was done swearing and bemoaning our bad luck once again? We all said "Hey, see you next Sunday!" Because we are Browns fans and we'll be back. It's what we do. Through thick and thin, in good times and in bad, for better or worse, till death do us part. And maybe not even then, since I fully expect to go to a heaven where the Browns never lose. Hopefully, I won't have to wait that long. And some day, before I die, we'll win a Superbowl. And it's going to be freaking glorious! See you on Sunday. Go Browns!!